Motherly Love <3

I recently uploaded an insta pic which is still capturing my heart. I don’t feel the caption I provided does enough justice to the topic at hand, which is the extraordinary bond between a mother and child.  

The bond between mother and child is so powerful. This photo speaks volumes to me, a picture really does reveal endless reflections and words. Motherhood is so personal, so deep and so intimate all in one. I’ve met countless mums who fret about the little things instead of looking at the big picture which is - Love. 

It got me thinking of all the beautiful and lets be real - extraordinary mother’s that I have met through my business and why they’re so hard on themselves! Motherhood in all forms is so tough because it is so individualised. I haven’t come across one parent who doesn’t have the latest edition of Pinky McKay, Tizzie or ‘What to expect when you’re expecting’. These books while helpful to some do miss a key value (in raising mini humans that you have grown inside of your own body) - Love and Acknowledgment.  

Whether it’s the terrible two’s, three-nager, newborn or first day of school there are always going to be hurdles in the form of miscommunication. As your child progresses (never regresses) in their development they (to put it simply) on the wrong page to you. I visit so many clients who mention what routine they’ve tried or they’ve read this and the most common “is it normal”. These are are very valid but I want to strongly encourage you all to take a step back and look at things from their point of you. 

We need to be less harsh on ourselves as we evolve together with our children - yes together! Your child’s development tests you because you are learning it as much as they are. How you feel when the breakfast gets thrown across the kitchen is as unreasonable to them as it is to you. Take a moment at each hurdle to reflect and acknowledge them. Your love and understanding is what will remain. Your love and understanding is what will get you through - because you are ALL doing an amazing job. You are ALL amazing Mother’s. 

Treasure all moments, soak up all the memories (including throw downs) and smile. It’s always better to remember the hard times with a smile, even the hourly wakes for feeding or find the dummy that’s right next to them. 

Love, 

Anca

Travelling guidance

Dreaming of a getaway? Does the thought of a simple domestic trip scare you ? This is for you then, because Anca has got you covered! Having kids can be expensive, and travelling can seem like you need a lottery ticket before googling webtjet prices. Aside from the cost, you start to think of all the little details; 

• They're going to scream on the plane?  
• How will we keep them entertained ?
• What about the pram ?
• Getting to the airport? Getting home! 
• Food while we're there? 
• What about delays ? 

Going on a trip doesn't have to be an overwhelming experience, it simply comes down to being organised and then a little bit more. Preparation is absolutely KEY! So, lets get you all prepared! 

Entertainment

Whether you're going international or domestic - if you  have an infant over 12months old i'd invest in a few of these free apps. Your must apps are one click away!!! 

Wash away the guilt of having an ipad on a plane - you are trapped on a plane with a ticking energy time bomb so you gotta do what you gotta do!  If you have some kids that are older, i'd recommend checking out these apps which include a range of fantastic educational games (i personally love exploring the Nat-geo one. 

Feeding the little one/s..... 

Sugar is the devil here. I'm not opposed to the standard treat here and there, but having a child trapped on a plane, and in a small confined space, it's safe to say the logical thing is to keep the sugar devil away. I've made a little slide show of some of my favourite snacks - i've done 4 long journey's with kids under 5 years of age, these worked a treat, especially having them in the 'fun bag/treat bag'. When you feel he has been behaving or simply needs a distraction - Want to have a dip in the fun bag????". It works a treat - PUN INTENDED. 

Mixed nuts. 

Fantastic healthy and filling snack for everyone

Dried Seaweed ! 

A fantastic, crunchy, messy and tasty treat

 (click to scroll)

The key to all of these snacks are -very low sugar or natural sugars. Having an over supply rather than an under supply. For the long distance trips i've taken I have found that kids who are full tend to have less mood swings. Make sure the fun bag is closed and not available 24/7, it's always a good idea to keep it as a treat or opportunity. 

Milk zone 

Here are some points about getting those bottles together if you are not breastfeeding. The flight attendants are always helpful when it comes to topping up water, etc. Don't be shy to ask for help! 

• Have your formula pre-measured, in the bottle ready to go. 
• take off and landing can be a horrifying experience for some little ones, so be sure to make some extra bottles incase they need soothing feed
• There is filtered water on the plane - that is available to you. Once you pass security check, go to the store and buy a big bottle of water so you can top up at your seat (especially if you're doing a domestic trip). 
• Ask the flight attendants if they wouldn't mind topping up the bottle with hot water - they have boiling water all ready to go. 
• Another trick is to have a formula divider container, and as you get on the plane, ask the air hostess if she wouldn't mind topping them up, so when you're ready for a feed you can just add the formula. This will save you so much time
• For post formula kiddies, I would recommend taking some longlife on the plane. You can buy the small sizes to get through security and all you have to do is pour into the bottle. Simple and effective. 

Getting to the airport 

This is usually the big stress when it comes to trips. If you are doing a domestic trip then I highly recommend checking your Health fund, and car insurance - WHY ??? If you're with NRMA or BUPA, then you could be entitled to up to 20% off at Park and Fly. 

• https://www.parknfly.com.au/? - A great service where they take you on a shuttle (with car seats if needed), drop you to your terminal, pick you up and have your car ready. So effective especially if you're going on a quick trip. If you have any discounts through your car insurance it almost costs the same as organising a cab with car seats etc. Less hassle, more convenience - IDEAL when travelling with kids. 
• https://www.mynrma.com.au/membership/benefits - 20% off park and fly!!! Make sure you check and compare all your health insurance, private insurance and car insurance. For all the premiums you pay, it sure is handy to have some benefits. I've attached the NSW seat belt/car seat regulations for travelling in taxi's - I get asked this question so frequently that I hope this helps and be sure to pass it on to those who are travelling !!! 
  • http://roadsafety.transport.nsw.gov.au  I've attached the NSW seat belt/car seat regulations for travelling in taxi's - I get asked this question so frequently that I hope this helps and be sure to pass it on to those who are travelling !!!
• https://www.uber.com/en-AU/ride/ - Ride with UBER! cheaper, better service and 100% more reliable than taxi's. NB: you are also able to catch an UBER at the airport arrivals now in the public pick up area! 

While you're in the airport - don't give your pram away - hold onto it (i absolutely push for Yoyo's or the simple Maclaren that does a 2 second origami fold-away. When checking in, inform them you need the pram up until boarding - it makes carrying your hand luggage a lot easier 

- On that note, don't carry lots of loose toy items in the bottom of the pram for the simple reason of you'll enter security check and have to stand there emptying it all out!!!! Keep to the fun bag/treat bag. All the goodies you need in one simple location, quick and effective. 

Be safe and have fun! I hope this information is helpful to you all! 

Happy travels!!!

Anca xxxx 

When the going gets tough, the tough get going.....

---

Sometimes parenting can simply come down to motivation and management - when you need to get to a playdate and don't want to be delayed an hour, you gotta simple HOOK those kidlets in. 

BUT HOW?!?!?!?

No. 1: You need to get yourself prepared before managing others. I see so many parents saving themselves for last and before you know it, your adorable, dressed, and ready to go bubba has rubbed sudocream all over themselves or destroyed something. Once you have yourself prepared, you are 100% ready to take on all challenges thrown at you (literally). 

-----> On this note, get yourself a mapped out schedule. If you need to be out the door and on a ferry to work by 8am, I would be thinking over a thorough plan of action. 

No. 2: Don't introduce distractions if you can avoid them - the big one to avoid here is TV! Unless your kids have grown up and can reason with you through conversation, then don't go near those electronic devices AND lets be real, do you really want to listen to ANOTHER paw patrol episode (let alone meltdown)????????  

No. 3: Chill on the compromises! Don't spend 20-30mins asking you child do something and negotiating a compromise to go with it, because you're basically just teaching them that if they listen to instructions they get something - which is absolutely crazzzzzzzzzzy! 

------------->> Remember: you'll be giving instructions for a long, looonnnnngg, looooooooooong time, so do you really want to be negotiating each time? NO! It's simple: 
 

1.  Give the instruction
2. Give the instruction in a firmer tone if nothing happens 
3. Provide a warning (if nothing changes)
4. Follow through - time out. 
5. Hugs & sorries / instruct again
6. By this point, if they still aren't listening - keep to schedule, simply say nothing, take them to complete instuction (e.g. get them dressed/shoes on/etc..... ) 
7. Debrief when calm later on 

Now, this is all easier than said. You need to remember that every family and parent has a different boundary with their child. If you've been negotiating and suddenly follow these steps, your little one may be a little shocked. Best thing to do is talk to them the day before, tell them you need help, tell them mummy wants your listening ears on. Set up the new boundary. 

Every new day is an opportunity to make a change :D 

Anca xx 

Are you a victim of the daylight savings horror show ?

Let's start by setting the scene...... 

You've been bathing in the glory of mastering a sweet bed time routine, and NOT a 5am wake up. Smiling away as you hear your little ones in the morning but aren't horrified to see that it's pitch black outside. You get up, begin the breaky train, turn on the tele for some background noise, 

THEN...... 

YOU STOP BUTTERING THE VEGEMITE TOAST. 

"Did I read that right ? " 

"wave goodbye to an hour of sleep"

Oh no, SHIT! You grab your phone, jump on the group chat to your fellow mum pals and say, "OMG, I TOTALLY FORGOT DAYLIGHT SAVINGS STARTS!". 

It's OK. Anca's got your back. 

Now, there are two avenues you can go down here. The first is, you had the warning of daylight savings and therefore have the opportunity to do some preparation. The second is, you had no warning and are panicking about the pending doom you'll be facing tomorrow morning. 

DEEP BREATH

I'm going to start with the second scenario, because we are in the crux of the change, and an hour of sleep loss can feel like a whole night to some parents. 

• The first rule is not to follow that voice in your head that says "if I run their energy out, maybe they'll go to bed earlier and sleep longer". This is a NO. NO. 
  It's one thing to make sure your little one uses up their energy stores, and it's another to drain them completely. Don't set yourself up for the over-tired screaming festival. 

My rule of thumb is always that over tired kids usually take longer to fall asleep and are incredibly restless when snooozing

• If your regular bed time is 7pm, aim for 6.30pm. The key to mastering daylight savings is to ignore the daylight outside. Just because the sun is out, doesn't mean their body clock isn't ready for resting time. 
  I like to encourage an extra book/s, or what I like to call 'independence time' - Let your little one have 10-15mins of quiet time in bed with books (not a stimulating toy), ALONE. 

Children are as independent as you allow them to be - if you give them wings, they're fly! 

• "But if they go to bed early they'll wake earlier!!!!" - I'm sorry families, but this is a myth. Kids are so different and there are so many factors that come into play. I can't emphasise enough to TRUST your instinct -
  
  If your child is tired, it's time to chill and not focus on the light outside. Their body needs at least 8-10hours of rest. This being said, please ignore the myth of "put them to sleep later to avoid 5am". By implementing allocated down time in bed, 30mins earlier, your child is learning to enjoy resting - this is much easier to work with at 5am. 

  • THE BAD NEWS: Yep - so for a good week (at least), your little gem may get up at 5am (because their body clock is telling them it's 6am). This is OK, don't hate it because it is logical. You need to educate your child now on their new wake up time. 
    HOW? Using calm words and actions. "It's not time to wake up, back to bed" Ifyour child is under 15months you can take on a similar approach by not commencing feeds as soon as theyre up, and treating it as a night wake up. Calmly go inside, lightly pat them or cuddle them. Try not to turn on all the lights unless you actually want the day to start that early. 

• NAPS - Be mindful that your little one may be wanting to doze off earlier than expected (especially if they've been up since 5am). Try not to let them over-sleep, allow for a rest, not a long sleep haul. 
  For the bubbas, you can expect their morning sleeps to definitely come in a bit earlier. As they adjust to the new time zone, slowly start to push it out again. 

Anca's daylight savings tips and tricks: 

• First things first, slowly start to bring their bed time forward (or back) if it's usually 7pm you'll want to start the 10-15min increment change - this will help when the clocks change (in either direction) and it wont be too dramatic for them
• If your child is older, talk to them about it - Use books, pictures or make up a fun story about the sun and the moon. (use the button below to see Anca's suggestion). 

• Prepare the room! If you have blinds/sheer curtains, grab some black paper and cover the windows, this will make bed time a little easier for your child to mentally grasp the 'night'. A child's body clock is so sensitive that it's important to monitor external factors. 
• Take some breaths. You need time for you which will help your patience and tolerance levels and to also assist in being a bit more sympathetic to your child adjusting to the clock. 

To Solid or not to solid?

Ahhhhh, the age tale of 'is my bubba ready to start solids?'. The key word in this question lies in the "MY"! Every child is so different when it comes to readiness - it's important to look for some of the common signs. 

• Can they hold their head up by themselves?
• How are they sitting? Can they balance upright? Are they tilting on the highchair, or confidently sitting? 
• making chewing motions with their mouths
• Watching you intensely as you eat - and trying to take it off you.
• opens mouth when you hold a spoon up, or just makes chewing motions. 

These are all the most common signs that your little one is ready to begin solids - sadly they don't know that their first meal is some seriously foul baby cereal (we all know it's horrible). 

Now you're asking yourself, "my baby is doing all these things, but they're only 4 months old, or 5 months old!". It's ok, I know you've read copious amounts of books on the firm 6 MONTH RULE, but lets be real - times have changed, especially diets. I can't encourage families enough to trust their instincts - YOU know your child. If they are born foodies, all you can do is embrace it and start the adventures of solids. 

“an infant’s need for energy and nutrients starts to exceed what is provided by milk, and complementary foods are necessary to meet those needs”

— http://who.int/mediacentre/factsheets/fs342/en/

Anca's tips and tricks 

Once you have decided to go down the solids path, here are a few tips and tricks to keep in mind. 

• Make a meal planner! You want to keep track of what you're feeding the little one. 
• The first food  should be the icky iron based rice cereal - other good first foods are smooth fruits or vegetables cooked, and then either mashed or pureed.
• When your baby is showing confidence in swallowing and digesting the initial beginner foods, then you can start to add some variety in new foods and textures. 
• Finely mashed or pureed foods (no salt, sugar, fat or other flavour added) are the foods you should stick too
• Soft and flexible spoons are handy for first use - as well as their little fingers. (it's messy, but let your hair down to their independence) 

For any questions, sense of direction or just a simple recipe of mushy puree - leave a comment and i'll get right to it. 

Don't forget that you know your child the best, don't go reading a thousand books and doubting yourself. 

Love, 

Anca xxx